Five Feel Good Tips For Making Yourself Feel Good…

Just because it’s sunday and we’ve been shaking our stuff all weekend, we’re feeling good, and think you should too1 So here’s a few short tips to help out that inner voice…

Never apologise

Ok, by this we mean through your body language, or for who you are – we don’t mean in ‘accidental’ situations, when you did something improper and probably should apologise. We meet so many ladies who are unsure of themselves. They have forgotten who they are or would rather let someone else take the ‘limelight’ as they feel they don’t deserve it. Let us tell you something: we are all equals, we all deserve fabulous. Whether that is feeling fabulous walking down the street or enjoying a fabulous night out with friends equally as fabulous as us. Never let your body language apologise on your behalf, and by this we mean shrinking back from situations because you feel unworthy, feeling awkward and holding yourself hunched, holding your head down and vocally over-using the word ‘sorry’. No. Breathe in, hold yourself upright, shoulders back, head up and tell yourself you deserve a fabulous life. You can make fabulous happen and you don’t need to be sorry. Try and be conscious of when you say the word ‘sorry’ and replace it for something else more fabulous.

On the performance sode, if you are new to it, it’s easy to misinterpret the body language of those in the crowd… Say someone looks away when you’ve directed your action at them… Never apologise with your body language – they’ve probably looked away because they are shy! We also see a lot of new performers rushing off after their act or coming on for the curtain call, shoulders hunched and afraid to meet the applause of the audience. This is like your body screaming ‘I’m sorry for being here!’ We could write many more examples of this, and they all have the same response: why are you sorry? You don’t need to apologise.

In short, never apologise for being you. Be the biggest, boldest you, you can be. Be strong, be direct, be confident. You are fabulous, what is there to be sorry about?

Believe in yourself

Yes! By going on stage, you are asking the audience to believe in you. By applying for shows you are asking producers to believe in you. By spending all that time and effort (not to mention cash!) on an act you are asking yourself to believe that it’s all worth it. It is. You must believe in yourself. Believe that you are going to go on that stage, be bold, be brave and be resolute and you will smash it. Use visualisation techniques, project in your mind the image of you doing your act and tell yourself you are worth it. And stay true to that belief.

Never dance ‘for your partner’… 

A lot of girls come to our classes asking how to dance for their partner to make themselves feel sexy. Trust us, you will never feel sexy if you are only trying to feel sexy for someone else. How sexy is checking their reactions to you dancing or taking your kit off for them (especially if you have a lukewarm or embarrassed response – which will make you feel like crap)? Getting affirmation from our significant others isn’t sexy at all, but it’s an easy trap to fall into.  Forget about them for a minute and trust us, they will not forget about you if you do this simple thing… Flip it around and do it for yourself. Be selfish. Pleasing yourself, doing things for yourself and making yourself feel good will make you feel strong and sexy – and most importantly, you will have that confident allure that is untouchable and irresistible. If they still seem disinterested (and trust us, they won’t!) then it’s tough on them! You are fabulous and you know it!

Wiggling makes you feel feminine!

Yes, we’ve all done it – got into the habit of trudging along, shoulders hunched or walking in a ‘butch’ way. does this make us feel good? Probably not. Get used to holding your head up high, imagine someone is pulling you upwards as you walk by a golden thread attached to the top of your head, and allow your bones to stack on top of each other. Roll your shoulders back and walk with ease. This is walking with confidence and the more you do it, the more confident you will feel. Practice walking in a way that will make you feel feminine. If you add a little wiggle, even better. Put on some music and have a go at some hip movements – the basic figure 8s from belly dance are great ones! Also hip circles big and small…

Eye contact and a smile, every time! 

One thing guaranteed to give the illusion of confidence, even though you might not feel it inside is giving eye contact to those we meet. Especially when coupled with the winning walk above (if someone meets your gaze in the street, meet it back with eye contact and a smile) you’ll be surprised how good it feels! If you enter a room, give eye contact and a smile! Bump into someone in a supermarket? Eye contact and a smile… Going for a job interview? Yes, you’ve got the idea – eye contact and a smile…

Finally… 

Yes, we know that is five already, but we thought we’d tell you this: surround yourself with things you love, whether that is spritzing on your favourite perfume ‘just because’ (the smell will uplift you! Spritz some on your hair so when you swoosh it, the perfume will waft into the air!), having a bath with a whole lush bubble bar slice, wearing your favourite lipstick, putting on nice underwear underneath your uniform, or wearing your favourite heels to walk around the house in… A little bit of indulgence is what keeps us happy and the essence of who we are!

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